Chris Worden
2 min readJun 21, 2021


I wish there were a way for everybody to know the impact of every comment they make before they make it. It really sucks you are feeling sad about this.

But I just can't shake my mystification that we let so much stuff shake us. I don't know if this will come off as invalidating or affirming, but you are NOT alone. Even remotely.

If I have a 12" penis, and I wear a speedo that is as tight as your bathing suit, what do you expect the reaction will be? What if I'm 7'11" and show myself doing anything? What if I'm 3'2"? What if I'm albino? Or midnight black in skin tone? What if my nose is long? What if I'm balding (as I am)? How many people will comment of my overall attractiveness derisively, in large part, because of that? What if my eyes are far apart.

Comments will follow in EVERY one of these occasions, and that's independent of whether people love or hate these features, so when you say you don't want to participate in a system for having "rogue" body parts, that system is damn sure America.

But, ironically, it's your own self-perception that defines what IS rogue and what is even insulting.

If you love being an albino, and somebody goes, "Damn, Casper!", you can go, "I'm like snow, bro! Blazing white and chill as f!"

Also, I'm sure a ton of people think Jason Stratham, the Rock, or Patrick Stewart have some sexy bald thing going on, but I'd wager that you'll get 10 times the compliments on your boobs that I would on my I should just stop taking photos of myself?

I could. But why would I devote two seconds of mental energy to endorsing haters?

I guess I agree with Mark, and if you don't learn this lesson at 50, you're going to spend a lot more time feeling depressed.

If people don't like your boobs, f them! Or stop acting like there is no middle ground. You know what the dude with the 12" penis can do to avoid the luring or derisive comments? Photos above the waist.

Just waving off Instagram all together just feels like you are literally cutting off your life (from Instagram) to spite your boobs, and that's what really sucks. I hope you can get comfortable in you, regardless of what people think or say or do.



Chris Worden

Satirist — Ideator — Creative — Politico — Hip Hop Enthusiast— Attorney